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Fauci Gently Tells Trump Why He Can’t Hold Parade to Celebrate Great Job He Is Doing

bver_hunter

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2005
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Wow, this is mind boggling, as if it is a parent preaching to their 5 year son i.e. you cannot boast about a achieving a task where there is no end in sight as yet!!

Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.

Dr. Anthony Fauci spent several hours on Saturday gently explaining to Donald J. Trump why it would be “a bad idea” to hold a giant parade to celebrate the great job the President is doing to combat covid-19, Dr. Fauci has confirmed.

Trump first raised the idea of a massive parade early Saturday morning, arguing that it would address the “biggest problem” created by the pandemic thus far: the lack of appreciation for his own efforts regarding it.

“A parade would put Jay Inslee and that woman in Michigan in their place,” Trump bitterly insisted.

As Trump began drawing up plans for a parade, a panicked Dr. Fauci interceded and tried to explain that such a celebration would be “much nicer” if held after the pandemic is over.

https://www.newyorker.com/humor/bor...old-parade-to-celebrate-great-job-he-is-doing
 

shack

Nitpicker Extraordinaire
Oct 2, 2001
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When I read your post, I was thinking how could this possibly be true? It is mind-boggling. Maybe it's a joke. But then I'm thinking that with trump anything is possible. So I clicked on the link and saw that it was a satire piece.

Good one. It had me going.
 

Smallcock

Active member
Jun 5, 2009
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Sadly bver_hunter has no idea what satire is and actually believes it's true.
 

danmand

Well-known member
Nov 28, 2003
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New Evidence Indicates Intelligence Not Contagious

By Andy Borowitz

March 26, 2020
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—New evidence uncovered over the past several weeks indicates that intelligence is not contagious, a study by the Centers for Disease Control reports.

In a controlled experiment documented by the study, a seventy-nine-year-old man with intelligence was placed in close proximity to a seventy-three-year-old man without it for a period of several weeks to see if even a trace of his knowledge and expertise could be transmitted.

After weeks of near-constant exposure, however, the seventy-three-year-old man appeared “a hundred per cent asymptomatic” of intelligence, the researchers found.




“In terms of facts, data, and wisdom, there was zero community spread,” the report stated.

The researchers, however, left open the possibility that intelligence might be transmissible to other people, just not to the seventy-three-year-old who was the subject of the experiment.

“There is evidence to suggest that this subject has developed a super-immunity to intelligence, making it impossible for even rudimentary information to permeate his extraordinarily thick cranium,” the study indicated.
 

Frankfooter

dangling member
Apr 10, 2015
79,760
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I like these ones.

WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Calling it a “promising development,” Dr. Anthony Fauci said on Sunday that alcohol may help people survive the most severe effects of coronavirus briefings.

Noting that millions of Americans have been exposed to the daily briefings of the White House Coronavirus Task Force, Fauci said that he had voluntarily submitted to a preliminary trial of the alcohol-based therapy.

“What we have found is that a single dosage before the briefing and as much as a double dosage after the briefing do much to alleviate the most acute suffering,” Fauci said.
NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report)—Determined to address the “No. 1 concern of the American people during the coronavirus crisis,” Fox News Channel announced on Thursday that it would air a three-part prime-time series on Hunter Biden.

The series, to be he co-hosted by Sean Hannity, Tucker Carlson, and Rudy Giuliani, will attempt to soothe the anxieties of Fox viewers who have suddenly been plunged into uncertainty about the activities of Joe Biden’s son.

“People are trapped inside their homes, they’re worried, they’re scared, and they don’t know where to turn for accurate information about Hunter Biden,” Hannity said. “We’re here to fill that need.”
 

Frankfooter

dangling member
Apr 10, 2015
79,760
17,578
113
The really sad thing is that it is only with respect to the chosen one that anyone could believe it was true and I do not have a hard time believing that he has at least thought about it.
Its true, only the believers in the cheeto king would fall for this as a real story.
 

bver_hunter

Well-known member
Nov 5, 2005
27,340
5,560
113
When I read your post, I was thinking how could this possibly be true? It is mind-boggling. Maybe it's a joke. But then I'm thinking that with trump anything is possible. So I clicked on the link and saw that it was a satire piece.

Good one. It had me going.
Well spotted, as I deliberately started this satire thread just to get a laugh out of these really sad times.

But with Trump, everything is hilarious and this was almost realistic. Only smallcock could not catch the humour. LOL!!
 
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